Swirl and Sniff...or Sniff and Swirl and Sniff?

Next up in the absurdist world of alliterative wine tasting methods, we have the (I've decided) inseperable brothers Swirl and Sniff. Again, the idea is simple: take a moment to learn what the wine in your glass smells like before you pour it down your throat. This is an important step, because so much of what you taste in wine is in its aroma (also called its "bouquet" or, ridiculously, its "nose").

Swirling the wine around in your glass before you smell it, as forcefully as possible (without spilling!), helps. The idea is to get some oxygen in there, which will force some of the aroma to "bloom" into the glass. Personally, I like to sniff, and then swirl, and then sniff again, but only because I like to discover how the character of the wine changes as it "opens up". Take deep breaths, and really get your nose into the glass for full effect.

When you follow these suggestions, you can learn some interesting things about the wine you're holding: basic things like what flavors will be prominent in the wine, but also more complicated things like how well-integrated the alcohol is and how mature the wine is.

That's right, it's time to talk about another sign of a too-young wine!

If the wine smells of green pepper, it's either too young to drink, or was made from unripe fruit and will never be ready. Or, it could mean that it's Chilean, but winemakers there like to refer to "jalapeno" to avoid the stigma of a young wine (I, personally, like to roll my eyes at this). If the green pepper not isn't too overwhelming, just giving the glass some time to open up will help. This can be accomplished with more swirling, or by decanting (pouring the wine into a wider, shallower container so there is more surface area in contact with the air) for a while before serving.

Another thing you can learn by sticking your nose in your glass is that the bottle is bad. Now, I don't mean that the wine isn't good, but rather that something has gone wrong with this particular bottle. Usually, this has to do with the cork, either from a common bacteria that taints some cork and can ruin a wine, or from an incomplete seal, which causes oxidation. Both of these things are bad for wine. Really bad. You'll know it when you smell it (though you can see oxidation in some wines in the form of a "browning" of the color.)

Sometimes, a bottle can go bad from a secondary fermentation if a tiny bit of residual sugar and live yeast make it into a bottling. If a bottle is supposed to be still but has fizz, don't drink it!

Allright, so now we're at the point of pulling in the reigns a bit again. If all of this sounds overwhelming, or too fussy, or just plain weird, don't worry about it. Just have fun, and try to find some new bottles to add to your list of favorites! You'll become more accustomed to this absurd behavior as you go.